What Is Discipline?
What does it mean to have discipline?
When you hear the word "discipline", what comes to mind? For many people, there is some harsh image of a regimented life devoid of pleasure and never straying from that path. If you do happen to fall off of the wagon, punishment is sure to follow. One may also imagine someone else meting out the punishment, which highlights the difference between discipline vs self-discipline.
Years ago, I was trained as a teacher in the Montessori philosophy. Within this tradition, there is the idea that freedom must be paired with self-discipline. From a very young age, children are given freedom to choose activities within a very carefully-constructed environment, which fosters learning and curiosity. The more self-discipline they demonstrate, the more opportunities they have. A good Montessori teacher will help each student cultivate this self-discipline, not by punishing the student when she messes up, but by subtly reinforcing the importance of making good choices.
I think we should embrace this more gentle approach to our idea of self-discipline. You don't have to punish yourself for not sticking to your exercise or diet program. If you have ever practiced mindfulness meditation, you know that the point is not to clear your mind of thoughts; the point is to notice when you are distracted and return to the object of meditation (often the breath). Doing this over and over again trains the mind to slowly develop more focus and concentration.
Begin Again
When you make a promise to yourself to exercise more, missing one day or even a whole week of exercise, does not mean you broke your promise to yourself. It doesn't mean you should punish yourself. It doesn't strip your badge of "discipline" from you, as long as you come back to your promise. Notice when you have strayed from your goal, don't judge yourself harshly. Simply return and begin again.
Today is a new day, and each day is a opportunity to renew your promise to yourself. Keep coming back. It's never too late to start again.
